Just months ago I was screaming for relief...."PLEASE deliver me from this grave that "they" call a church!" We knew that there were no other options. Now, we are living on the other side of that decision. While Daddy is working two jobs to make up the one income; Mommy is at home wringing her hands and racking her brains for a solution. Isn't there some way that I can help?
The covers are calling my name. I want to stay wrapped up in my bed and sleep these struggles away. Oh, but for those five sweet little faces, I would do just that! I have such a tendency to make things all about ME. I don't think of myself as a selfish person...but in actuality the facts stack up against me! This family numbers seven and I'm just one. For a number of years I've cleaned up the messes in ministry, now God has called me to focus on the home front. Why is it such a struggle to be comfortable "ministering" at home? Why am I (silently) shaking my fist at people who don't even see me anymore? If I were being honest, I'd admit that I'm still waging war in my heart. It's past time for me to lay down my sword and pick up the mop.
Wayne is already plowing ahead. It seems the harder he works the more bitter I become. How did I happen to find such a wonderful man? He doesn't hang his head and groan; he puts us first and keeps on working. I love him. I'm missing the time we worked shoulder to shoulder for the church. (Really, it was more like phone to shoulder!) I'm missing his time, it's sparing these days.
I intended for this blog to be a comedy about my errors...it seems that recently, it has just been my confessional! OK, I'm ready to pick up my mop! Now, where did I put that thing?
But the one thing that I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead. I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3: 13-14.