Pornography. It came up today. "It's just pictures, right Mom?" They are only 12, 11 and 9. My big kids. Maybe I could just gloss over this today?
Surely, they haven't been exposed.
I was only eleven when I snuck my older sister's book Clan of the Cave Bear. Yeah, it was definitely porn to me. That same year I was at a slumber party when the birthday girl's mom rented us a pay-per-view. I was thirteen when my friends and I found those dirty magazines in the barn... Every incident is burned into my mind. I remember where I was and who I was with. And, I remember wanting to see more.
I was a church kid who hung out with church kids. I lived in a Christian home with a plethora of rules and regulations. But I never had to go too far to find pornography. And my kids, with today's technology, are literally just a "click" away.
It's been my experience that kids educate kids on all things "birds and bees". So all these dirty little secrets and misguided assumptions on sex are swapped at slumber parties and sleep-overs. Am I wrong? I can thank junior girl scout camp for adding several undesirable words to my vocabulary. So on this day when my son asks, "It's just pictures, right Mom?" I cannot skirt the question.
No, porn is not just pictures. It's words, it's actions, it's music and it's everywhere. It's on ipods, cell phones, laptops, video games, commercials and billboards. It frightens me for my children because I know the stronghold it has, even on an eleven year old kid. A pastor friend of ours told us the pornography can do more damage than crack cocaine. If you don't believe me, ask Tiger Woods. It starts somewhere. It starts small. But pornography is huge and it's a threat to us all.
That's what I told my kids today.
I reassured them that Daddy and I will do all we can physically and spiritually to protect them. Our rules, just like my parents, were created for their protection. That includes being proactive about sweeping out the porn that creeps in when we are unaware. The temptation is always there. But there is hope. Praise God, there is hope!
You are tempted in the same way all other human beings are. God is faithful. He will not let you be tempted any more than you can take. But when you are tempted, God will give you a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 Corinthians 10:13
My husband's a licensed counselor and certified sex offender therapist and has run counseling/therapy groups for men addicted to porn for many, many years. For *Christian* men. Dads, husbands, deacons, pastors, teachers - all ages, all walks of life. It *is* huge and it *is* a threat - to *all* of us! The brokenness is...heartbreaking. But you are right - there *is* hope. So long as we have Christ, we have hope!
ReplyDeleteKari, the threats we face raising our children are harder to ignore as they get older. I'm praying that these years at home will keep them strong and focused. To think that one of my precious children would suffer from such brokeness makes my knees buckle. I will cling to His promises and praise Him for 1 Corinthians 10:13.
DeletePraying for you and your sweet family today.
My husband used to be addicted to porn. I thank God that he has been sober for over a year after going through a treatment program at a Christian counseling center. It worked, and he has been working through the underlying issues that led to the use of porn as a "coping mechanism" to start with. He has seen so much growth in his emotional health and in his relationship with God. If anyone reading this has a porn addiction, please know that there is hope!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your story of hope here! God is good.
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