Swimming in fear is scary and exhausting. As my boy struggles to get a grip, I fear that maybe he won't. I borrow tomorrow's trouble before they even exist. It's as if the two of us are stuck on a never ending tilt-a-whirl ride. I cry and pray, his daddy prays, but the ride keeps on dipping and spinning. I fear the ride will never end.
Yesterday was a gorgeous day here in Virginia. Eighty-three degrees in February! We met about fifty of our closest friends at our favorite park. My boy worried that nobody would play with him, he fretted that we would be too late an hour before we were supposed to leave. I held my breath. As soon as we pulled into the parking lot the boys disappeared into a crowd of Nerf gun armed bandits and I only saw a blur of them for the next three hours. I exhaled!!
The best part of meeting up with our play-group is the fellowship I enjoy with the other mamas. These women have become fast friends of mine. Every week that we get together it's like a swap meet of ideas and encouragement. Yesterday was no different. I had arrived with my cup nearly empty, we left exhausted from playing, exhausted from talking.....but fully charged to face the trial before us. Friendship is good medicine, as is the empathy we moms have for each other.
This morning I read about another mama, her name was Jochebed (Exodus 1:6-2:10). Her terror wasn't an invisible fear but a terrifying reality. It was commanded that her sweet baby boy be drowned in the river. Did she let her fear take over her rational thoughts? Did she crumble? No. She came up with a plan. She made a little basket and sealed it with tar. She sent a big sister to watch over her boy as he floated in his mama-made mercy ship. How she must have cried bitter-sweet tears as she nursed the baby that had been rescued by the Pharaoh's daughter. What courage. What faith.
I'm working on my plan. I've stepped off the tilt-a-whirl.
Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9
I've been thinking about you guys all weekend. I wish I was there to give everyone a great big hug. Prayers for you all and for your plan!
ReplyDeleteOoooh, I've got a fear-filled child, too! My Abby is only three, but the fears number far more than her age! I'll keep reading here for wisdom to help and to let go. :)
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